{"id":37,"date":"2016-11-29T22:56:03","date_gmt":"2016-11-29T19:56:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thoughtsbywiza.wordpress.com\/2016\/11\/29\/why-your-african-parents-dont-believe-in-your-crazy-dream-why-you-cant-blame-them-but-should\/"},"modified":"2023-11-23T00:23:00","modified_gmt":"2023-11-22T22:23:00","slug":"african-parents","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wiza.jalaka.si\/thoughts\/african-parents\/","title":{"rendered":"Why Your African Parents Don\u2019t Believe in Your Crazy Dream + Why You Can\u2019t Blame Them but Should Pursue It Anyway"},"content":{"rendered":"Reading Time: <\/span> 7<\/span> minutes<\/span><\/span>

Being a member of Generation Y is tricky. For those who may not be in the know, Generation Y basically refers to millennials, basically, persons reaching young adulthood around the year 2000. People like me-ish (If you consider 2012\u201316 close enough to the year 2000 to count.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s extra tricky (but statistically more awesome\u200a\u2014\u200aI\u2019ll explain in a minute) if you\u2019re a member of Generation Y and born African. You may find yourself frequently torn between the principles and habits that you learned from your native culture and those you may have adopted from foreign influences.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s difficult to describe, but those who have experienced this know exactly what I\u2019m talking about.<\/p>\n

Like the disappointment of opening an ice-cream container only to find frozen\u00a0beans.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Anyway, it\u2019s especially extra tricky when you\u2019re a member of Generation Y, born African to middle-class Generation X parents (born roughly from the early 1960s to mid 1980s) who were also born African.<\/p>\n

I know that sounds like a bit of a stretch, but the above statement is true for me as I believe it is true for most of my readers (pretty much the <\/em>three<\/em><\/strong> of you )<\/em>.<\/p>\n

So, if you\u2019re an African<\/strong> aged around 17\u201328 with parents who are aged somewhere in their 40s\u200a\u2014\u200a60s and had frozen beans in their ice-cream containers (implying your life was middle-class enough to warrant ice-cream at home), and go to the village to see your grandparents, I\u2019m basically talking about you.<\/p>\n

You\u2019re special.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

If you don\u2019t fit in that criteria, this post may not make as much sense for you but you\u2019ve already started so let\u2019s carry on. Somewhere along the path to adulthood, you may have developed some ideas and dreams. Thanks to the technological magic of radio, television and the Internet fuelling the fast-moving spinner rims of globalisation, we as millennial are the most sophisticated, educated and ambitious generation of people to have ever existed. I\u2019m not just pulling these facts out of my ass either<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Everybody has hopes and dreams, and some people get to realise them, and others don\u2019t. A lot of African parents of Generation Y folks tend to discourage their children from pursuing their craziest (and often most ambitious) dreams. Especially in my country<\/a>, where I believe this is the norm. Such parents would rather raise you to follow a more traditional career path rather than chase what you really want to do. Often times they will cite that no other \u201cYourCountry<\/em>ian\u201d has ever done that before and dismiss your amazing crazy dream as a hobby you do on the side while you earn the Masters in Accounting that your grandfather only dreamed of.<\/p>\n

Let\u2019s face it, African parents are not very supportive of career plans and dreams that are outside the box. I recall many occasions where my parents reminded me to work hard in school so that I can get a good job and live peacefully. I\u2019m also glad they also gave me the freedom to experiment with entrepreneurship and fail multiple businesses and an NGO idea at their personal expense (like seriously, thanks guys!).<\/p>\n

I recall numerous sessions in primary school where the teacher would ask the class, \u201cWhat do you want to be when you grow up?\u201d and \u201cbillionare technology rockstar\u201d wasn\u2019t an acceptable answer.<\/p>\n

For the last few months, I\u2019ve been thinking deeply about this and have what I believe is a reasonable and fairly articulated reasoning behind why this is the case, particularly in the context of African millenials and their parents.<\/p>\n

The problem is, it\u2019s a bit of a long story as this should actually be three separate articles.<\/p>\n

The following ideas I will discuss will not make much sense until the end (hopefully), so just trust me on this, sip your tea and read on.<\/p>\n

Why Your African Parents Don\u2019t Believe in Your Crazy\u00a0Dream<\/h4>\n

In simple terms, the answer is in the differences in how Generation X and Generation Y were raised, and the extreme differences in their circumstances regarding opportunities and aspirations, and the main reason why (ish) is colonialism. Or rather, our escape from it. Albeit pointless as we are still pretty much colonised<\/a>\u200a\u2014\u200athat\u2019s a rant for another day.<\/p>\n

You see, the vast majority of African countries all obtained their independence around the same time. 1960s\u200a\u2014\u200a1980s, around the same time Generation X was born. The Africa we live in today is vastly different from colonial Africa. A lot of our stubborn non-dream-seeing parents were born in rural areas (dependant on country) or urban centres that were in the process of being industrialised.<\/p>\n

THEY<\/strong> were raised to work hard in school so they could get jobs in the new industrialised economies independence was meant to create. Engineering, medicine, accounting and science are all revered by Generation X parents because they are all old, proven professions that have stood the test of time.<\/p>\n

At the time of this writing, \u201cbillionaire technology rockstaring\u201d isn\u2019t a very old or popular career path in Africa. I hope this changes soon.<\/p>\n

This is why your parents do not believe in your crazy dream of being an accomplished bestselling author of fiction or world-record breaking rap star or multimillion-follower Instaceleb. They don\u2019t believe it\u2019s possible because they aren\u2019t aware of the unique enabling factors that being in Generation Y awards you, and you can\u2019t really fault them because they grew up differently, in a world where it wasn\u2019t possible to send love letters halfway across the world instantly through little plastic, metal and glass typewriters without keys that also take photographs and play records. Witchcraft!<\/p>\n

This brings me to the second part of this article:<\/p>\n

Why Your Crazy Dream is\u00a0Possible<\/h4>\n

The Internet. It changed everything. In the not-so-distant past, information in the world was scare and fragmented. The most useful and powerful information was closely guarded by the elite minority. In the past, if you wanted to become a world class master of a fancy profession, let\u2019s say a mechanical engineer\u2014 you\u2019d have had to study at a specialised institution, often requiring you to have travelled to the places in the world where the masters were. But the Internet changed that. Now the masters are right here on your computer, tablet or phone. You know that thing you\u2019re using to read this article right now?<\/p>\n

That thing<\/strong> gives you access to all of the world\u2019s public information, neatly organised and categorised and searchable to your heart\u2019s content. It\u2019s absolutely incredible that you could have access to all of that information quite literally in the palm of your hand. A volume of information that would have shamed the Library of Alexandria.<\/p>\n

Approx 0.0000000000000000000000001% of the\u00a0Internet<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

The availability of information is very significant. In the past, we as Africans could not compete with people from other places in the world because we did not have access to the same information that they did. Sure, we may not have the same resources or environment today but information is a very crucial part of the equation, because now we know how<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Our infrastructure may not be at par, our environment perhaps not as pretty, but our brains are just as good as theirs. We\u2019re just as smart and capable, despite being told otherwise our whole lives.<\/p>\n

Imagine what the Egyptians of the Nile Valley would have achieved (you know, the guys who pretty much brought us flippin\u2019 irrigation<\/strong>) if they had instant access to all of the world\u2019s information and a means of instantly communicating with anyone anywhere in the world in real time.<\/p>\n

In a Trump victory-esque manner, our beautiful African culture may have left us young Africans with a huge inferiority complex, and the day we overcome that as a generation is the day we uplift the continent.<\/p>\n

We need to believe in ourselves, the world is open for the taking. We are the youngest continent in the world, we have a lot of life left to live. Our dreams can outweigh our memories.<\/p>\n

Why You Can\u2019t Blame Your\u00a0Parents<\/h4>\n

I don\u2019t believe that people are inherently bad. We\u2019re not designed that way.<\/p>\n

If you Gen X parents aren\u2019t supportive of your particular Gen Y dream, it\u2019s probably not out of malice. They were born in a different time, a different world. They\u2019re probably just doing what they believe is best for you, which is keeping you focused on your education and the social institutions so that you can make the most of yourself in their version of the world.<\/p>\n

This obviously means they\u2019re being good parents and you should be grateful. That\u2019s a gift that a lot of people don\u2019t have.<\/p>\n

\u2026But Should Pursue Your Crazy Dream\u00a0Anyway<\/h4>\n

That being said, you owe it to yourself (and the rest of us\u200a\u2014\u200akinda) to make sure you find a way to make your dream work. I\u2019m not saying you should drop out of school or quit your job, be practical.<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t know how you should go about pursuing your dream or whether it\u2019ll even pay off in the work. I just know that it doesn\u2019t take much to find the information on how it\u2019s done<\/a>, and from personal experience getting started is the hardest part.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t worry about what will happen tomorrow, just start and stay committed. Everything worth having takes hard work and the time will pass anyway.<\/p>\n

Let\u2019s stop dreaming about the Africa we always wanted and go make it instead. Nobody is coming to save us.<\/p>\n

An aside: I\u2019ve had this post in my drafts for close to six months now and it\u2019s never been good enough for publish in my eyes. It still isn\u2019t, but I set myself a deadline so ready or not, it had to go.<\/p>\n

If you liked this post, please click the little heart icon to recommend it. Questions or comments are more than welcome and if you want to have a chat, I\u2019m available on email<\/a> (yes, the contact form works), Facebook<\/a>, Twitter<\/a> and Instagram<\/a> and Snapchat<\/a>. I do my best to respond to everyone.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Reading Time: <\/span> 7<\/span> minutes<\/span><\/span>Being a member of Generation Y is tricky. For those who may not be in the know, Generation Y basically refers to millennials, basically, persons reaching young adulthood around the year 2000. People like me-ish (If you consider 2012\u201316 close enough to the year 2000 to count. It\u2019s extra tricky (but statistically more awesome\u200a\u2014\u200aI\u2019ll explain […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"templates\/template-full-width.php","format":"standard","meta":{"cybocfi_hide_featured_image":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[34],"tags":[3,13,18,22,24],"class_list":["post-37","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-tech","tag-africa","tag-hope","tag-millennials","tag-self-development","tag-startup"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wiza.jalaka.si\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wiza.jalaka.si\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wiza.jalaka.si\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wiza.jalaka.si\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wiza.jalaka.si\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=37"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/wiza.jalaka.si\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":221,"href":"https:\/\/wiza.jalaka.si\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/37\/revisions\/221"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wiza.jalaka.si\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=37"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wiza.jalaka.si\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=37"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wiza.jalaka.si\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=37"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}